5 Things Going Right

April 26, 2013 By

In my effort to be a more “glass half-full” person, I thought I would talk about the five things that are working well right now…making me happy.

1. The words, “Okay, Mommy.” I love that I have a child that when I tell them no to something, the answer is sometimes, “Okay, Mommy.” Sometimes there is crying before or a small struggle but if I stand my ground, it ends up with these words. I know those of you that have ever been in a checkout line that was filled with candy understand my relief when I hear these words.

I heard "Okay, Mommy," after I said it was time to leave.

I heard “Okay, Mommy,” after I said it was time to leave.

2. The book I am rewriting/adding to. I’m not sure how or why but I can’t seem to stop writing. My favorite part of writing this book that I don’t know I’ll ever do anything with is that the characters take on a life of their own. I can spend hours with my notebook and pen and be completely engrossed and I love that.

book

3. Emails from long-lost friends. There is nothing like opening your email and seeing the name of someone who you miss or that you haven’t talked to in a long time. If you are missing someone and questioning whether you should reach out, do it. It will make the person’s day.

4. New readers and new comments (and loyal readers). Those of you that blog, I know you get this. It feels amazing to have someone respond to your writing. It’s the equivalent of a stranger stopping you on the street to tell you your kids are well-behaved or ask you where you get your hair done. It is a feel-good moment. I just want you to know that I appreciate all that read and commenting lets me know you are there. So thank you.

5. The 17 Day Diet. I wrote a post about the struggle to lose weight. Click here if you’d like to read it. A few months ago, I was reading a success story from a very talented writer, Galit from These Little Waves. She was doing the 17 Day Diet and had lost quite a bit of weight. I decided to try it and I’m telling you, it works. I have lost 14lbs and feel so healthy and fit. It doesn’t feel like a diet. It was more of a tweak in the way I was eating. 17 minutes of exercise is completely doable over here and I actually look forward to it. You know the people who say happiness shouldn’t come from a number on the scale? Well, they might be right for some but for me…I see the number on the scale and it makes me happy. Is that right or healthy? I don’t know and right now, I don’t care. I’m too busy being happy.

 

So there you have it. This weekend is going to be packed with running around so I wanted to concentrate on what was making me happy. You know before the road rage, bad refs, kids wanting to be out and social and early morning games hit.

What about you? What’s making you happy?

 

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Filed Under: Blogging, Friends, Happiness, Having Fun, Random Thoughts, Writing 25 Comments

Connections

April 12, 2013 By

When I started blogging, it was all about the writing. I wanted to be a writer for as long as I could remember and blogging seemed like a great way to start. At first, it was just for me. As a way of documenting the things in my life. Then, I put my toe in the water, so to speak and sent it out to friends and family. That felt odd and exhilarating all at once. Would people want to read? Is it even that interesting? From there, I put my foot in and started posting on my personal Facebook page. The response was like an instant confidence booster and someone, Leslie G., suggested that I join Twitter. Wait…strangers would follow me? And some might read my blog? Sign me up! That bubble was burst shortly after I signed up when my first 5 followers were from porn sites. I didn’t give up and though I’ve been on it for more than a year, I’m still figuring that part out. Then someone, Jody B., suggested that I have a Facebook page for the blog. I did and am up to over 200 followers (and will always welcome more if you know anyone that might like it :) ). I took a class from Shell at Things I Can’t Say and Ashley at My Front Porch Swing and pretty much dove right in. With the help of those girls and Kimberly at Reflections of Now and Ashley and Lisa from The Dose of Reality, I was off and running and ADDICTED. Addicted to the connections that can be made in the blogging world.

I joined SITS, a community of bloggers and found a wealth of information to help me grow as a writer. There I met some fabulous women and was lucky enough to meet up with Samantha from Life as a Wife (which I believe is on hiatus at the moment). That was my first time meeting someone from the blogging world and I was nervous! Everyone that heard I was going in RL was concerned that I was being played and that it wasn’t actually a woman but alas it was and a new friendship was born. One that started online and continues in RL, mostly through Facebook because she is off making her dreams come true. Fast forward to Spring Break when I was supposed to meet Susi from Boca Frau but unfortunately I couldn’t make it work. Next time I am there, we have to make it work because it seems pretty tragic that we were probably a street away from each other.

Then two nights ago, I had the pleasure of meeting Michelle from A Dish of Daily Life. Again, I was warned that it might be a man or a murderer (because all murderers find their subjects by setting up a blog about raising their families or pursuing their passions) but again, it was not. It was a wonderful and talented blogger that is just as down to earth in real life as she is in person. Time had gone by way too quickly and it felt like we had just scratched the surface. Blogging allows us to feel like close friends even though we have only known each other a short time. I love that. I wanted to soak it all up and make plans to meet again. I encourage you all to check out her blog. You won’t be sorry. Plus, she is a girl after my own heart and asked that the picture be taken a bunch of times because we were unsatisfied with how we looked. :)

Michelle and me

Now in addition to the writing, I am loving the connections I have made. Say what you want but online friendships are real and they are strong. I know I can count on the friends that I have made through blogging to lend and ear or some advice. It just happens in emails and texts and instant messages but it doesn’t make them any less strong. I can honestly say I love some of these women and I’ve never even “met” them. Crazy, huh?

What about you? Have you met some of your blogging friends in real life and did it live up to your expectation? For those that don’t blog, do you have friendships that thrive soley through technology?

 

P.S. Some of my favorite bloggers have made it into a book! Best $8.99 on Amazon I have spent in a long time. I thank you ladies for my laundry not getting done, meals not cooked and hair not washed. I am too busy laughing!

Pee Alone

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Filed Under: Blogging, Friends, Writing 22 Comments

A Little Positivity and Blog Issues

March 20, 2013 By

Something has been going on with Feedburner, the service that I use for email subscriptions. Sometimes it sends out my post at a different time than I have set or sometimes not at all. I think there was some buzz about it going away and since it is all I know, even if it’s not working correctly, that sends me into a small panic. You know the thought of having to change things or learn something new.

Are you wondering what the positivity in the title is referring to? The worst part of Feedburner acting up is that some of you, especially the followers not on Facebook or Twitter might have missed this wonderful post by my friend, Chris Carter at The Mom Cafe that I posted yesterday. Since I saved it in my drafts folder back in February, it posted it under February even though it was yesterday’s post. She came up with a way to ease our guilt when we are having one of “those” days. If you missed it, you can find it HERE. Please take a minute to check it out. It’s great advice that is east to implement. I’ve already started it and it works!

I have a question for you: When I look at my header (title of the blog), it doesn’t look right. How are you seeing it? I’ve checked with a few friends (okay, just two) and they are seeing it fine. I just want to make sure everyone is seeing it like they are and not like I am. This is how I see it:

See how there is only half shown and the shadows of Leo and the kids are only their heads?

See how there is only half shown and the shadows of Leo and the kids are only their heads?

 

While we are on the subject of blog issues, if you feel so inclined and you like what you read here, if you could click on The Best Mom Blogs in the sidebar, it would put me back on the map (I seem to have fallen off). I’m thinking of taking my blog off of there but thought I’d give it a go first.

 

As always, I just want you all to know that I appreciate that it has been two years and you all are still reading. It warms my heart and really, is better than spending thousands of dollars on therapy. :) Just wanted to say thank you!

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Filed Under: Guest post, Odd things that happen in my family, Random Thoughts, Rants, Writing 18 Comments

Tidbits for New Bloggers

February 18, 2013 By

True to the name of this blog, my two-year blogging anniversary came and went with me so busy, I didn’t even realize it happened. Two years and I am still learning the ropes…still getting comfortable saying, “I am a writer.” Surely with two years worth of posts, I can say that now, right? I love writing here. I haven’t gotten tired of this space and with the craziness that my family constantly creates, there is always new material.

 

With that being said, I have picked up a few tips and tricks along the way that I would like to share with anyone that is just starting out blogging. I am by no means an expert and I still look to bloggers that have been doing this for a lot longer to guide me on my own journey but I would love to think that I could help out someone just starting out.

 

1. It’s been said before and I’ll say it again, turn off your CAPTCHA so people can easily comment. For those of you that don’t know what that is, it’s the “type the series of letters or numbers to prove you are not a robot” thingy or as I like to call it, “the quickest way to make me feel like an idiot” because I am CAPTCHA challenged. Having the CAPTCHA on your blog won’t stop me from visiting but sometimes, it might stop me from commenting. Not just because it is there but because I suck at trying to figure them out. To read a really funny post about what a pain it is, check out The Dose of Reality’s: CAPTCHA, I Want to Punch Ya. So funny.

 

2. A lot of the fun in blogging is the connecting to your readers so it is good practice to reply to reader comments. It definitely keep me going back to blogs when the writer responds. However, another practice that is done that I think counts is that instead of replying to comments, the blogger will visit the blogs of the people commenting. Most bloggers enjoy comments so that works as a way to build a relationship.

 

3. Bloggers are human and they get busy but if you are going to reply to comments, make sure you reply to all of them. I don’t mean if you get 50 comments you answer all of them. There has to be a cut-off so I get when a blogger answers the first 30. What I don’t get is when they skip around. They answer comment #5 and maybe #8 and #48. If you are the 7th person to comment, it doesn’t feel great that your comment wasn’t worthy of a reply.

 

4. This brings me to tip #4, make sure if you are commenting, it is meaningful and shows that you actually read the post. That being said, it’s always nice to hear, “Great post. I loved reading this and it [insert brought me to tears or made me laugh],” to which you can reply, “Thanks for stopping by!”

 

5. Make sure you make the most of social media. I, personally, post on both my personal page on Facebook and on the blog’s page and on Twitter. This is an area that I hope to get better at in the next year. It’s important to spend time on the sites you are posting your blog on. It can be annoying to only see links and never any conversation. People that know you will want to read what you have to say.

 

6. The best way to build up an audience is to visit other blogs, link up to other blogs and if you still find yourself having trouble, take a class.  One of the things I have to be better at is asking people to guest post on my blog. I have guest posted on others and not only is it the ultimate compliment but it is also a way for your writing to reach others. To all of the bloggers out there that I follow, I’d love to have you guest post and this is my shameless way of asking because I am afraid of hearing, “No, I can’t” or “No, I don’t do that.” This fear of rejection thing is why I haven’t sent any of my work in either. Another thing I am working on in this next year.

 

7. A great place for bloggers to learn the ropes is The SITS Girls where there are great articles and message boards about every blogging topic you can think of. it is an invaluable resource for bloggers.

 

8. If you are new and you don’t own your name or your site, do it now before you get too far along. You can always do it but one of the things that made me sad is my pageview number didn’t transfer and I was nearing 500,000. There is nothing that says you have to own your name but since I fell in love with what I was doing and I loved my name, I wanted to make sure I owned it.

 

9. Don’t be afraid to change it up a bit. If you are a blogger that normally only posts recipes and crafts, write a personal post so that the readers feel like they are connecting to you. If you are someone that rants about this or that, throw in a positive post so that your blog doesn’t feel too heavy-sided one way. I once followed a blog that was very sunshine and butterflies and maybe it’s just me but after the 10th post about how great her marriage was and how great each of her kids were and how amazing her dogs were and how she was so successful in her career and how people stopped her all the time to ask if she was a model, I decided I didn’t need to feel any worse about the job I was doing and stopped reading.

 

10. And the advice that I have a hard time following but have learned the hard way, don’t blog angry. Don’t get me wrong, some of my best writing has come from writing angry but it’s not worth the bridges burned or the hurt feelings that would result from doing it. If you are okay with the fall out, by all means go for it but I think it is better to write it and revisit it when you have cooled off.

 

So there you go.  Year #2 is under my belt. So many relationships made and more followers than I ever thought possible. I haven’t made a career out of it yet but haven’t ruled it out yet either. I got a trip to New York out of it and hope that was the start of more to come. I have to say thanks to Kay Brend and Terese Janik for giving me the idea to begin with two years ago.

I am by no means an expert but hope these help those of you starting out.

If you’ve been blogging for a while, tell me what your favorite blog tip is.

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Filed Under: Writing 28 Comments

Short Post: New York

January 13, 2013 By

This is going to be really short because I have to get ready to go to New York tomorrow. It’s the first time Leo and I have left the kids since we have had Gia and I am a little nervous and I want the house to be super-organized so my dad doesn’t have to look for anything and if he does, it will be obvious where it is. Nothing short of  a miracle but I am almost done.

Why is this 100% suburban wanna-be country girl going to New York City, you ask? Two days after Christmas, while driving home from Nico’s basketball game, I got an email from someone from the NFL. She read my posts about our experience with football and invited me to go to a Safety Commission luncheon. I would listen to a few speakers talk about measures taken to make football a safer sport and then give my opinions or thoughts. I’ll discuss the whole story when I get back but long story short, there was no way I was going to be able to go alone to NYC…I get nervous driving in downtown Wheaton or downtown Naperville and have never been to Chicago by myself. Since Leo is a coach, they want to hear his opinions as well so they are paying for both of us to go!

I write a blog about being one carpool away from a padded cell and now I am off to NYC. Who would have thought? As a proud football mom and a fantasy football widow, anything with the NFL is exciting so wish me luck. I’ll report as soon as I get back.

If you could spare a prayer that the chaos stays away so that my dad doesn’t have to deal with it, that would be great.

If you are a blogger, tell me if your blog has ever paid for you to go somewhere exciting.

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Filed Under: Having Fun, Writing 23 Comments

Windows

January 8, 2013 By

When Gia woke up yesterday, I did the same thing I have done every day for the last two weeks. I took off her diaper and said, “Today do you want to wear underwear or a pull-up?” And she answered me the same as she always does, “Nothin’.”

The rest of the morning was spent the same as the last two weeks: “Gia, do you feel like you have to pee?” “No thank you, Mommy.” Then at some point after an enormous amount of time passed, I would get her to sit on her little potty and she’d sit for about 15 minutes. Every single time she said, “Don’t get excited, Mommy.” I told her I wouldn’t and that seemed to comfort her. It makes me wonder how much pressure she felt when she was going and I would be so excited I’d jump up and down and hug her. Anyway, she doesn’t go. She gets up, goes to play and pees all over the floor. It is a little like living with an incontinent dog or cat. This is not going to be an easy task.

Then I wonder, did I miss the window? Six months ago, she was going. She wasn’t in underwear yet but she was showing an interest and she was going. Six months ago it was baseball season and potty-training in porta-potties is the most disgusting, scary thing ever. All three of my other kids were potty-trained by 2.5. Gia will be 3 in two weeks. She refuses to go. No amount of bribing or encouragement is working. Just a lot of crying wanting the M&M’s. And a lot of peeing everywhere but the potty. I know…she’ll do it when she is ready. The twins pretty much potty-trained themselves. Don’t push. I get it. But I am a little nervous that I missed the window of opportunity.

I started laboring with Nico on a Wednesday. Went into the hospital and they sent me home. I had contractions from then until Friday morning when I went in and my water was leaking so they kept me. I remember when the nurse said, “There is a window of opportunity that you can get the epidural and if you are wanting one, you don’t want to miss it.” I jumped the gun, got one and it slowed my labor down immensely. I didn’t have him until 5:00am Saturday morning with only one side working with the epidural. Dumb window.

I remember the window of time when I could rock a bikini and not a mom bathing suit (you know…the tankini with the skirt), when I could wear a tank top without worrying about jiggling in places that no one wants to jiggle, when I didn’t pick out clothes that had to hide the wear and tear of four pregnancies, when I had a good hair day every single day and when every thought wasn’t on which foods would be okay to eat and which ones would stay with me until I ran (gag) on the treadmill to get them off. Oh, how I miss that window.

Speaking of clothes, I am constantly missing the fashion window. By the time I figure out something is in style, it’s outdated. What is with that? But let me tell you, if a window of time comes back featuring 80′s clothes, I am all over it!

Did I miss the window of time to go back to work? You know the time when you are still hirable? The education my kids are getting is fine and all but I don’t always agree with what our district does. Things were changing when I left…I remember more teaching for the “tests”, less creative writing, recess being phased out and more emphasis on homework. None of that sounds appealing to me. I know from my teacher friends that it’s rough out there. Would I even recognize it anymore?

Did I miss the window of going back to school? There was a time between the twins and Rocco that I was going to go back. I even toured Argosy in Schaumburg because I was going to go there for a masters in counseling but then Leo was told that in order to get a promotion, he had to get his MBA and since we couldn’t both go back to school, he won. Well, guess what? He got the promotion anyway without having to go back to school but by then, we decided we wanted another baby and the Rocco roller coaster begun. I know I am not ancient and I could go back at anytime but with Gia being little and life being crazy, the timing doesn’t feel right. It felt right in the window of time before Rocco.

What about the window of time I had to travel all over? That window is shut for now. Totally missed it. That would have been the summer of 1996 until April of 1998. Longer if I did it without the approval of my parents who were not okay with me traveling with Leo before we were married. And again, I know our time will come to be able to do that. Leo keeps telling me that but I can’t help but feel like it would have been a lot more fun when we were young and adventurous (and I could wear a string bikini).

One of the scarier windows that I pray that I didn’t miss is making sure my kids, especially Nico know where I stand and what I expect of them when they are faced with the temptations that kids are faced with today. A lot of it is trial and error, I know. Especially with social media since it wasn’t around when we were young but did I get to them before they were faced with others? Nico’s 14 and the twins are 11 so there is a lot of raising left to do but you know what I mean…that time when they are most impressionable and willing to listen, not jaded by their friends or the opposite sex (or movies like Step Brothers or Ted). There is that small window of time and I hope I made it.

In the writing world, there is a window of time when things are relevant. I keep missing it. I write things and it takes me awhile and then when I am done, it’s not relevant anymore so I have to edit. I’ve been saying forever that I’m not sure if the book I wrote (am writing…must.let.go.of.characters.) is young adult or adult and lo and behold, I picked up a book in the adult section that was similar (characters were the same age and it was a romance) and I thought, “Ugghhh…by the time I get mine ready and submit it, it won’t be relevant anymore.” I realize that is a hit or miss. Some themes are timeless and if a book is good, it will get published but I do always feel like I am” a day late and a dollar short”.

In the very literal sense of the word, the windows in my house kinda suck. They are really nice and I am sure the owner before us painstakingly picked them out but they are awful in the winter. Nico and Tommy’s room is freezing and I keep asking Leo to put the plastic over them and he keeps saying he will but he hasn’t so I keep being awakened at 3:00 in the morning by one of them upset that they are freezing. Sleeping in two layers of clothes isn’t fun. Isn’t heat supposed to rise? Why is our basement warmer than our upstair?s  And yes, all of our vents are open. That’s a little off the subject of windows but the windows in my house are what got me thinking of other windows (metaphorically speaking).

I know most of these windows aren’t necessarily shut for good and some can still be pried open (going back to school) and some might be better left shut (damn…the bikini one unless Zumba kicks in before summer) but it is food for thought.

What windows do you feel might be closing for you?

 

Wait? What?! You want me to do what in that potty??

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Filed Under: Random Thoughts, Writing 15 Comments

I Am

December 5, 2012 By

I am a wife. I love with all of my heart.  My heart skips a beat and I’d rather be with him over anyone else in the world. I married him so that we would have a family and spend time together with that family. It hurts me when I am the one wrangling all of the kids while he get to be social with our friends. I am thankful that he understands this knowing that it’s important that we stand united. I try hard to be a good wife and I feel the guilt from falling short. Lately, it’s coming home to find that the kids ate all the dinner or I didn’t make enough. It’s coming home to a house that looks like a tornado hit. It’s taking the hit when I am mad or sad or anxious about anything else. I promise to be better.

I am a sister. It is a huge part of my  identity. Being tied to four other people in such a way that no one will understand grounds me. Comforts me. There is NOTHING that I can’t tell my sisters. I can share with them things I wouldn’t share with anyone and they never judge me, they’ll always love me. They still love me when I don’t call back or am distracted on the phone or crawl under a rock for a little bit. They know me better than I know myself and don’t wish for anything else but me (and maybe a phone call back). I need to be better at making sure they know how important they are to me.

I am a daughter.  I love being around my parents. I love their stories. I love that they love big. They make each of us feel special and their home always feels like coming home. I am the oldest daughter. I should have been the second daughter.  I am not a good oldest. I need to be more thoughtful in what my parents might need from me which at this point I don’t think is much more than a phone call everyday. And even then, I fall short. I take things personally when they are only trying to help and I get short and snappy. I need to be better at letting them know how much I appreciate them.

I am a friend. I choose my friends carefully because they have the power to hold my heart in their hand. I try very hard to be there for my friends in hard times and not judge them or let them down. I expect the same. I love my friends. It is like a great big sisterhood but I need to always remember that sisters can’t walk away but friends can so that relationship is more fragile. It takes work not to crack it. When I am having a bad day (and lately there have been many), I will try not to hurt another friend in the process because I will remember that she is not obligated to be here. I will respect the need to “check out” once in a while and I will expect the same when I want to. I have let my friends down by turning down invitations and not making the effort and I promise to try harder, even if it means Gia doesn’t get a nap or I have to deal with a toddler in a restaurant or a house that is not toddler-proof. I need to be a better friend.

I am a Christian. And a learning one at that. Learning to trust. Learning to let go. Flawed in every sense of the word but I am aware of it. I am working to grow and learn and find peace. Flaws and all. I am not perfect, nor do I strive to be but I want to be better. I want to feel at peace. I want to love others as Jesus did/does. I want to accept others as He did/does. I want to forgive as He did/does but I don’t always. I get frustrated. I get hurt and I lash out. Things go badly and I want to give up and say, “Forget it”. And forgive? This one is my stumbling block. I need to be better at trusting and letting go and forgiving. Some days I am so close to getting it right and some days I am so far off. The good thing is I have a lifetime to figure it out and that peace…it’s close, I know it.

I am a writer/blogger. Wait. Did I actually just type that? I did because I might not be published but I write so that makes me a writer and I blog so that makes me a blogger. Since 4th grade, I have been a writer. I cannot be without writing. It is a part of me. I write because I have to. Because I want to. Because without writing, my thoughts get all jumbled up. The stories in my head cloud my brain and I can’t think straight. Someday, I’ll fix what I’ve written and I’ll submit them. Someday, I’ll get the nerve to send in what is already done. I need to be more fearless. Blogging helps but even then I want to say so much more but can’t. Finally having a platform or a place other than journals under my bed feels good. The publishing part…I’m working on it.

I am a mom. I saved this one for last. I love being a mom and love my kids with my whole being. Not just my heart but my everything. I am sleepless because I love with my head and my mind races at how to protect them. I am emotional because I love with my heart and it squeezes with every kiss, hug or “I love you.” With every hurt, I cry. With every triumph, I cheer. Of all the things I am, I cannot afford to fail at this one. I am harsh with my words. I am loud with my voice. I am frustrated trying to get through to them about simple things like cleaning their room or brushing their teeth and about not so simple things like who they hang out with and keeping themselves healthy, how to be a good friend and staying out of trouble. I wonder all the time how generations before us raised kids without being on anxiety meds. So much responsibility and so much at stake. Four little lives depend on how good I am at this and I cannot let them down. I need to remind myself that they are only with me for a short time before they are adults and on their own. Nico, only 3 more years (WHAT?! How did that happen???). I need to be better.

I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a Christian, a writer and a mom. I am me. I am not for everyone. Take me or leave me. I am okay with that.

What about you? Who are you?

Pouring my heart out with Shell at Things I Can’t Say.

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Filed Under: Pour Your Heart Out, Writing 20 Comments

I Need…I Want…I Could Do Without…

November 10, 2012 By

I’ve had a few sleepless nights over here for one reason or another. Sleep seems to be a luxury these days. Leo was gone all last week and I don’t sleep that great when he is gone, there has been some angst in the raising of these kids, no one likes when someone is mad at them and Gia…sweet Gia…the stealer of sleep. I had a lot of time to think (and pray). First, I will say that the power of prayer really is amazing. Definitely celebrating small victories over here. Nico made the high school basketball team and I am so happy for him but as always, there was sadness when a few of his good friends didn’t make it. That part of sports is always so hard.

Anyway, I kept thinking about what I want in life and realized that a lot of what I think I need, I actually want and some of what I want is actually what I need. And then…there is the stuff I could do without.

What I Need:

I need my kids to be healthy and happy and if they aren’t I need the wisdom to know how to get them through it.

I need to feel peace in my heart about the way we are raising our kids.

I need a quiet night with all of my kids and Leo home and the only thing on the agenda be a home-cooked meal and a good book to get lost in.

I need space to figure out which direction I want to go.

I need to feel like I have an identity outside of being a mom and wife.

I need to feel like I am contributing to our family.

I need to stop eating strawberries and pineapples because I am obviously allergic to them and they are wreaking havoc on my mouth.

I need the peace that I get from having more God in my life.

On that note, I need to trust that God knows what He is doing and that there is a reason for everything even if I can’t see it right now because that will help me feel less anxious.

I need sleep.

I Want:

I want to be at a weight less than I am in order to feel healthy.

I want my kids to find something they love to do and find success in doing it.

I want the teachers my children have to realize that they have the power to make or break my children’s love of learning.

I want a calmer schedule.

I want the gene that won’t allow any item out of place in my house.

I want Taylor Kitsch to sign onto Chicago Fire and there be a love triangle between him and the character Kelly (whose name is also Taylor).

I want things as they once were.

I want to see my sisters and Rochelle more often than I do.

I want to go back in time and know that LeeAnna was going to move by Gina and that someday Chrissy probably will too and I want to buy a house in Geneva or St. Charles so that we can be like my mom and my aunt.

I want a publisher to accept my two children’s books and I want to stop editing and finish the other book I am working on. I would need to actually send them out or have time to work on it in order for this one to happen.

I want a family vacation with no time constraints and just time…time…time with the kids and Leo.

Things I Could Do Without:

Drama in any way, shape of form…well…I’ll take the drama from Leo dropping the kids off at my mom’s and driving me to the airport with bags packed ready to go on a luxurious vacation. That kind of drama is okay.

In-law issues

Homework

ParentVue

Tension among relatives or close friends

My kids fighting

Political judgements

Anxiety

Being late and still having to get treatments done

The feeling that I am being followed by “What Not to Wear” because my standard for what I wear in public has gone waaay down.

Four loads of laundry a day.

 

Speaking of contributing and wanting an identity of my own, I have applied for a few writing jobs. It’s a little bit adding to an already full and chaotic existence but it felt right. If it is meant to be, it is meant to be but if you like my blog, if you could click on The Best Mom Blogs to the right so my blog moves up, it might help in the application process. If you haven’t rated it and feel inclined to, that might also help. Thanks in advance both for voting and for the support.

 

What about you? What do you need, want or could do without?

 

Sharing a little bit of my life and where I am today with The Moments That Define Life’s Link-up:

 

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Filed Under: Parenting, Writing 15 Comments

Blog Issues: My Own Fault?

August 27, 2012 By

It’s come to my attention that there’s been some weirdness with my blog. Someone told me on Twitter that the site was down on Saturday. That was the same day that Feedburner went a little crazy. I went from 49 followers in the morning to 14 that evening. All was back to normal on Sunday morning but I thought maybe my smiling post and my lemon post offended a bunch of people. Not sure why it would but you never know. Then I found out that some people have been trying to comment and can’t. That’s very annoying and I’m sorry if it has happened to you. If it has, please shoot me an email to let me know. Thanks, Chris at The Mom Cafe for letting me know.

I am so technologically challenged that anytime I hear there is a problem, I panic. I have no idea how to fix it. I turn to Twitter or Facebook or my friend, Kimberly at Reflections of Now or Ashley and Shell at Other Half Media. If you are in need of a new design, check Kimberly out. If you have any needs blog related, check out Shell and Ashley. All three of them have been instrumental in helping me get my blog up and running. Thanks for letting me continue to ask you guys for help.

I have done a little bit of soul-searching the last week and have decided that I am my own stumbling block. I want to make money writing and then when I am presented with a chance, I freak. Well, that is an exaggeration. I didn’t freak but I did get a feeling like I wanted to run and hide. What is that? Even when I try to analyze it, I come up with: What is that? On top of it, every email I have gotten has turned out to be spam so there is a trust factor that is missing, too. My friend, Nikki at Dysfunctional Dose has been a huge support and cheerleader of sorts trying to encourage me to get myself out there. I admire her bravery in what she is doing over at her site. It’s hard to put yourself out there. Each time I think about having to write, I freeze up. What is that? The fear of being judged or someone saying, “Nope, that isn’t what we wanted at all.” I get stuck with writer’s block when I can’t write what I want. What if that happens? It’s no big deal if I miss a few days of blogging now but will it be if I’m being held accountable? I have to give a shout out to my friend, Ashley at TDOR here. If her help in getting rid of writer’s block work, she is a genius.

Did Google banning me from having ads on my site ruin me? Is it the fear that I’ll do it wrong or screw it up that stops me from even trying? I don’t know. I just know that I get a yucky feeling (real mature, huh?)when I think about it. Maybe it is what I’ve already said: I’m challenged in the technology area. I already have to depend on others to help me out and I’m not good at that in real life so what makes me think I’ll be good at it as a blogger in the blogger world?

So here are some questions for anyone that reads: What is the biggest risk that you have taken that you are glad you did? Or be bold and tell me one that you took that you wish you didn’t.

For bloggers: Do you make money blogging and did you have some of the same issues that I’m having?

For those that do: Did you find it hard to navigate through it? What’s okay to do and what isn’t? Did you ever have a “shoot, I wish I wasn’t doing this” moment?

For those that don’t: What made you decide you didn’t want to? By choice or because of what I talked about here?

 

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Filed Under: Writing 15 Comments

Summer Blogging and Writer’s Block

July 6, 2012 By

This summer has been tough. I have written several posts about it: you can read all of June’s posts in case you missed the chaos of this summer. The hardest part for me is the blogging part. I can’t get caught up. I can’t write the way I want. I can’t sit and read the blogs I love to read. Last summer I didn’t know what I was missing. I wasn’t a part of the blogging community. This summer, I have made connections and found women that I care about and care what happens in their lives so I know what I am missing. Call me strange but I love tuning in to see what is going on in their worlds and sitting at the computer reading and sometimes chatting is the equivalent of meeting for coffee and catching up. I wanted to put links to all of the blogs that I read daily but my link button isn’t working (I have bought Word Press for Dummies and have scoured the SITS site and am working on being a better WP user because what I do know how to use, I love).

The other thing is this…it is hard to write in this heat (104 yesterday, 103 and rising today). I haven’t experienced this much writer’s block since I was in college having to write term papers. I don’t want to be a “Negative Nelly” or a “Sappy Sally” and right now, I am either or on any given day. My power is back on and really, I am thankful. My air conditioning is on its last leg and the thermostat is broken so it won’t let me change the temperature lower. Instead, the air will only kick on when it gets to a certain degree in the house which I am certain is 110 degrees. So…while I am thankful for the air…my face is melting off making it hard to write ANYTHING!

Contrary to what it might look like, it is rare that I have longer than ten minutes at my computer on any given day to write anything anyway. I email, check Facebook, or go on Twitter (Have I mentioned how much I love Twitter these days?) from my phone while waiting in carpool lines, drive-thru lines, doctor’s offices and at baseball or basketball games (only when my kid isn’t playing). I’m not good enough to blog from my phone and I miss it.

What about you bloggers? How has summer changed your blogging habits?

 For those that don’t blog, has summer made something hard that is normally easy for you? Are you not able to do something that normally you loved to do?

Thankfully, I have Mama Kat’s Writing Prompts to help me along. Linking up with her today:

Mama’s Losin’ It

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Filed Under: summer, Writing 20 Comments

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