Indiana

April 22, 2013 By

I am going to start by saying, “Leo, I am sorry that I wrote angry the other day. I still HATE the poker club but I appreciate that you drove us to Indiana.” See, several things happened for the weekend to have shaken down the way it did.

1. I am a big freaking baby.

2. We had a huge rainstorm that lasted a few days causing the surrounding towns to be flooded (our town was in a state of emergency but luckily, we were fine) and several roads to be shut down. All I had to see was a few highways shut down for me to go into a panic about getting stuck and the plan changed.

3. I am a big freaking baby.

Okay so maybe not several things but maybe 2 things. Nico and Belle went with friends of ours earlier and then Tommy, Gia and me went at 11:30 when Leo got home from poker (sadly, he did not come in first). We did not get into our hotel until 4:00am and had to be up at 7 for Nico’s game. Rather than give you a play-by-play, I’ll do an old school run down.

B is for basketball and a lot of it. I saw only two of Nico’s games but thanks to Leo and Nico saw many, many more games than that. You know what I like about watching kids I don’t know play basketball while occupying Gia and Belle? Nothing.

A is for all of the money we spent on concessions and fast food. I think the healthiest thing Gia ate all weekend was a Snickers (that is healthy because of the nuts, right?).

S is for swimming. I took the kids swimming while Leo went to watch more games. Belle lasted a whole ten minutes before she was done watching Gia and we spent the next 45 minutes fighting about how if she would just play with her for a little bit longer, she’ll want to get out and then Belle could do whatever she wanted. The last thing I wanted to do was get in the pool with a bunch of teenage kids.

K is for kicking and screaming which is what happened in our hotel room and the car the entire time (or when they were awake).

E is for eating. I think we set some kind of record for eating junk. I didn’t even go to dinner with the team because Gia was so crabby and Nico was not wanting her to go. He said he hates when she throws a fit and people stare at us. This makes me laugh and wish I had video of some of his fits that he threw at restaurants and how I felt the same way and like I had to, he needs to get over it.

T is for terrible refs. In all the years I have watched basketball games (from going with my dad to the games he coached, going with him when he scouted games, cheering in high school for it, watching the guy I dated play it, watching Leo play in several leagues, watching Nico and now Tommy, there have been a ton), the refs at this tournament were the worst. Just awful. On the first day, they didn’t call anything and it was a free for all. The second day, the game took twice as long because the whistle blew constantly and at one point, we had 10 fouls and the other team had 1. It was so unfairly reffed (is that a word?) that the boys couldn’t even play basketball. It was awful.

B is for being short. I cannot believe how short I am. When you attend a basketball tournament where teams come from all over and are 15, 16 and 17 years old, there are some TALL kids. I felt like how a mouse must feel in a crowd of giraffes. And Gia? She walked through a couple of players’ legs. If I was a mouse, she was an ant. It’s funny because I never feel short until I am around high school basketball players. What is up with that? I don’t remember the guys I went to high school with being that big. I mean there were some but not this many.

A is for angry. Put six people in a room that sleeps 3 and you get six angry people. Nico was so tired. It was partly our fault. I don’t think he slept well waiting for us to get there and then when he did finally fall asleep, we woke him up to get in because he double-bolted the room. For the record, I was a nervous wreck with them staying in the room alone until we got there and kept in touch by texting constantly. They were only alone from 11-4 but no one got any sleep. Our friends were right by them and did a good job of taking care of them. Belle and Tommy had to sleep in sleeping bags on the floor so you can imagine the moods they were in. Keeping a 3-year-old who hasn’t slept very much in a tight space for two days is a sure-fire way to get an angry kid. She kept saying, “I want to go downstairs” (we were on the first floor).

L is for Leo. He got us there safe and sound and didn’t complain at all when I wanted him to either come get me to go to Nico’s games or wanted him to take me back. I’m not sure what was up with his GPS but he kept going in the wrong direction. I wish I had a dime for each time I heard, “Hmmm…I’m going the wrong way” right before a swift U-turn. Again, if it was me, who knows where we would have ended up so I am not at all complaining. Oh, and each time we got to where we were going, he would say, “Hmmm…I think this was actually faster.” Every.Single.Time. (For the record, it was not faster.)

L is for lucky. Nico has a great team with great families. I enjoyed watching the games so much because of the people I was sitting with. I never advocate getting kicked out of a game but the one game I went to where it was so heavily one-sided was only tolerable because of the other parents. It helps that some of the parents are as loud as Leo so I am not the only wife cringing. I think Nico is very lucky to have this experience with these coaches and these boys. I feel very lucky that we all got to see him play in this tournament.

I almost made this word “Basketbally” so I could have a Y is for yelling because though at Disney, I am a “yes parent”, in Indiana, I am a “no parent” which led to a lot of yelling.

It’s always nice to get away but next time, I want a room with two full beds and a fridge. And next time, Nico is going to have to get over Gia throwing a fit because I am going out to eat. And I am going to have the biggest margarita the restaurant serves because vacationing for tournaments warrants a stiff drink from time to time.

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Spring Break 2013: Forgiveness

March 30, 2013 By

We headed to Florida to stay with Leo’s mom and step-dad. I know I said I wasn’t going to do that ever again but Gia is older, Nico is older and I am not the same person I was two years ago. We left Monday afternoon and came back Friday afternoon. Pictures to come in a post later this week.

I’ll spare you the details of the stress of the plane ride with it starting out with us not having seats together at all. You see, we did but then the airline canceled our flight only to reschedule it for the same time but they didn’t give us our same seats. Can you imagine Gia sitting by two strangers? Can you imagine the horror the two strangers would feel? After many discussions, Leo came to the rescue once again and the problem was fixed.

I could talk about the difficulties of keeping everyone happy being the ages that they are. I could talk about the fact that Leo is the only one tan since he used an entire can of SPF 30 sunscreen. The rest of us either stupidly used 15 on the first day (me) or 50 (the kids) and burned to a crisp. Can someone tell me how someone can burn using 50 because I thought I was doing the right thing?  I could talk about all the time Leo took to go fishing or all the bonding time Gia and I got because we never get to do that at home (can you hear the sarcasm dripping from the words). I could talk about how Belle kept talking about people when they were still within earshot.

I could talk about how Leo and I had about a half hour alone the whole trip. Leo’s mom and Arnie are so good about giving Leo and me some alone time to go to dinner or go see a movie or go to Barnes and Noble but this trip was different. Nico was having a tough time. He’s at that age where all he wanted to do was go to the pool and didn’t want to do the things that the twins wanted to do or the things they usually do so he went with Leo and me on our first date night. We went to Barnes and Noble after dinner where I felt a little rushed and didn’t get any writing done since Nico was tired from being out in the sun all day.

We spent a lot of time at the pool which I loved. After burning the day before, I put 50 on and tried to keep the burned parts covered but in the end, I ended up with splotches of burnt patches all over. I’d post a picture but you’ll have to take my word for it when I say, “It’s not a good look.”

On our third night and second date night, Gia came with us. To say it was a night cut short is an understatement. We ate at the mall and then went to Barnes and Noble again for another shot at writing but with Gia there, there was no way.

What I do want to talk about on this eve of Easter is forgiveness and how it was the main theme of this vacation and what a hard path it is to take. I have been angry and frustrated for far too long and for things that have happened over the course of 20 years. I had reached a point where I was tired of feeling bitter and resentful. A quote that made a lot of sense to me was from Joyce Meyer,

“Harboring unforgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping your enemy will
die! Unforgiveness poisons anyone who holds it, causing him to become
bitter. And it is impossible to be bitter and get better at the same
time!“

I tried. I really tried. I was laid back. I was easy-going. I let things roll off my back. Little by little every boundary that I had worked hard to build over the years was crossed. Letting it roll off my back was getting old and feeling like “I gave and inch and a foot was taken” was settling in. It was rough because my kids and Leo knew that I was turning over a new leaf but my kids still felt the need to tell me EVERYTHING. And that takes its toll. Hearing things that aren’t true. Being blamed for things that are not my fault. All without defending myself or saying something. It was not a horrible time and I feel good that I gave it my all. I learned things about myself. I am capable of letting things go. I have no patience for dramatics of any sort. I enjoy spending time with Leo and the kids. I can only do short spurts of time. Forgiving is hard. After years of hurts, it has to be a conscious choice to forgive. You have to be able to look at the person that is hurting you and choose to see things differently. You have to be able to say, “In the grand scheme of things, does this really matter?” If it doesn’t, then let it go. I feel lighter. Happier. Even in the end when those feelings started to resurface, my good friend, Pam reminded me that “Rome was not built in a day. Baby steps” and I, for one am glad I took them.

What about you? Is there someone that if you forgave them, you’d feel lighter, happier? Why let them steal one more day of joy from you? There isn’t? Then just tell me how your spring break was. I’ve missed you guys! :)

**In case you are wondering, this post was approved by Leo.

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Wisconsin Dells

June 27, 2012 By

I am home. I thought I’d give you an idea of our vacation using numbers. Before I do that, I have to tell you how every single road trip begins in our family. It begins with Leo saying at about 5 miles away from our house, “Damn! I forgot the iPass.” Every. Single. Time. Even though we put some of our stuff in my dad’s car and Nico rode with our friends, our car was packed to the gills. So much so that our back seats were leaning forward. Tommy was sitting in the back so he was leaning forward and very uncomfortable and let us know…loudly. Once on the road, he gave us an update every 1o minutes: I’m fine. I’m comfortable. I’m uncomfortable. I’m squished. I had absolutely no access to the outside world and my phone wouldn’t even work to text my kids or the people I was there with. It felt very isolating and made me think again, “What did we do before cell phones?” I missed blogging and my blogger friends and really need to put in some time to catch up.

6-the number of days we were in the Dells.

10- the number of baseball games that Nico and Tommy played.

100- the number (guessing) of times I walked the halls from the lobby to our room.

5 or 6- the number of hours I slept each night.

7- the number of kids’ chicken tender meals that I ordered and or ate.

4-the number of Pina Coladas I drank (not in a row or even on the same day).

50-the number of times I said, “Nico, stop.”

10-the number of times I thanked my dad for staying with Nico for the whole day of his tournament so I didn’t have to take Gia (it would have been more but he told me that it was his pleasure and to stop thanking him).

1000-the number of Pretzel M&M’s I consumed over the course of 6 days.

3-the number of meals I missed because Gia threw a fit and I had to leave.

150-the number of times Gia asked, “Where’s Nana?”

1-the number of times that security had to come and tell us to be quiet (with my family, not the baseball team).

3-the number of loads of laundry I did because traveling with a teen and a toddler means dirty, smelly clothes.

15-the number of minutes that I had to shop at the outlet mall for myself.

2-the number of hours I had to spend at the outlet mall for my kids.

2-the number of times I got a whole bucket of water dumped on me without knowing it was coming.

50-the number of times Gia went down the baby water slide.

24-the number of times I applied sunscreen to the four kids.

25-the number of times I got the message, “No service” on my phone.

1-the number of bathrooms in the condo that 8 of us were staying in.

5-the number of times that I or people I was with got lost in the maze of the hotel.

10-the number of times my kids said, “This is awesome.”

10-the number of times I looked at my kids playing with their cousins and felt all warm and fuzzy.

5-the number of times I looked at my sisters and my mom and thought we really need a girls’ only weekend.

3-the number of times I looked up at the sky and thought that God must be having a chuckle at me raising a toddler and a teen at the same time and while two are in travel baseball.

1-the number of times I went to Walmart (if I had my way it would have been more…what is it with shopping at Target or Walmart while on vacation? Why does it feel so much better?)

15-the number of times I watched the same episode of Dora with her new puppy.

0-the number of family pictures that I got because it was near impossible to get us all in one spot.

50-the number of times I missed my sisters Nikki and Chrissy.

50-the number of times I thanked God for the blessings of my family. I’d be lost without my sisters and my parents.

 

Thanks goes out to K.T., J.W., K.J. and L.K. for entertaining Gia one way or another during the baseball part.

Kay and Julie, thanks for the moments of clarity. :)

Thanks goes out to my mom for giving me mini-breaks with Gia. My sisters and my nieces were a Godsend as well.

Traveling with four kids, one of which is a toddler is HARD. No sleep, junk for meals and meltdowns left and right. I woke up to a kick to the jaw every morning around 5am.

That being said, there were parts of this vacation that were wonderful…seeing the excitement in the kids’ faces, Gia wanting to kiss every bear’s face and her cute little butt as she ran down the hallways, sitting out on the balcony with my parents or sisters talking.

We came home in time for Nico to go to basketball, Belle not feeling well, having to wash Tommy’s uniform for his game tonight, Gia overtired and…Leo’s car battery dead.

Tomorrow, carpool duty for both boys and possibly another baseball game.

Oh, and Leo…he’s leaving tonight for a business trip…back to reality in the harshest of ways.

(I would have loved to have included pictures with this however, they would all have been of Gia and Belle since the boys were hard to pin down.)

So, did anything exciting happen while I was gone?

 

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