I’ve had a few sleepless nights over here for one reason or another. Sleep seems to be a luxury these days. Leo was gone all last week and I don’t sleep that great when he is gone, there has been some angst in the raising of these kids, no one likes when someone is mad at them and Gia…sweet Gia…the stealer of sleep. I had a lot of time to think (and pray). First, I will say that the power of prayer really is amazing. Definitely celebrating small victories over here. Nico made the high school basketball team and I am so happy for him but as always, there was sadness when a few of his good friends didn’t make it. That part of sports is always so hard.
Anyway, I kept thinking about what I want in life and realized that a lot of what I think I need, I actually want and some of what I want is actually what I need. And then…there is the stuff I could do without.
What I Need:
I need my kids to be healthy and happy and if they aren’t I need the wisdom to know how to get them through it.
I need to feel peace in my heart about the way we are raising our kids.
I need a quiet night with all of my kids and Leo home and the only thing on the agenda be a home-cooked meal and a good book to get lost in.
I need space to figure out which direction I want to go.
I need to feel like I have an identity outside of being a mom and wife.
I need to feel like I am contributing to our family.
I need to stop eating strawberries and pineapples because I am obviously allergic to them and they are wreaking havoc on my mouth.
I need the peace that I get from having more God in my life.
On that note, I need to trust that God knows what He is doing and that there is a reason for everything even if I can’t see it right now because that will help me feel less anxious.
I need sleep.
I want to be at a weight less than I am in order to feel healthy.
I want my kids to find something they love to do and find success in doing it.
I want the teachers my children have to realize that they have the power to make or break my children’s love of learning.
I want a calmer schedule.
I want the gene that won’t allow any item out of place in my house.
I want Taylor Kitsch to sign onto Chicago Fire and there be a love triangle between him and the character Kelly (whose name is also Taylor).
I want things as they once were.
I want to see my sisters and Rochelle more often than I do.
I want to go back in time and know that LeeAnna was going to move by Gina and that someday Chrissy probably will too and I want to buy a house in Geneva or St. Charles so that we can be like my mom and my aunt.
I want a publisher to accept my two children’s books and I want to stop editing and finish the other book I am working on. I would need to actually send them out or have time to work on it in order for this one to happen.
I want a family vacation with no time constraints and just time…time…time with the kids and Leo.
Things I Could Do Without:
Drama in any way, shape of form…well…I’ll take the drama from Leo dropping the kids off at my mom’s and driving me to the airport with bags packed ready to go on a luxurious vacation. That kind of drama is okay.
Tension among relatives or close friends
My kids fighting
Being late and still having to get treatments done
The feeling that I am being followed by “What Not to Wear” because my standard for what I wear in public has gone waaay down.
Four loads of laundry a day.
Speaking of contributing and wanting an identity of my own, I have applied for a few writing jobs. It’s a little bit adding to an already full and chaotic existence but it felt right. If it is meant to be, it is meant to be but if you like my blog, if you could click on The Best Mom Blogs to the right so my blog moves up, it might help in the application process. If you haven’t rated it and feel inclined to, that might also help. Thanks in advance both for voting and for the support.
What about you? What do you need, want or could do without?
Sharing a little bit of my life and where I am today with The Moments That Define Life’s Link-up: