I never thought I’d hear myself say, I dread the weekends but…I dread the weekends. I think that just when I’ll be able to enjoy them again, because the kids will all be in college, Gia will be at the age where I won’t be able to. You’re laughing at me, aren’t you?
I used to have the kids’ Halloween costumes picked out and bought months ago. Now, I have no idea what Tommy is going to be and I’m done giving Belle money for hers. I would have never been okay with a $50 costume and I am still not. I didn’t even put out my Halloween stuff this year. Is it wrong that I am just hoping it comes and goes quietly?
The last time I got the flu or was really, really sick, Rocco died. I know it was a coincidence and not related but when I got pregnant with Gia, I lived in fear of getting sick. I was never allowed to get a flu shot because I am allergic to chickens (I know…dumb allergy and really only allergic to feathers). The benefits of getting the flu shot when I was pregnant outweighed the risks so I got it and was fine. I got it last year and I was fine. I got it two days ago and not fine. I got sick. I was dizzy, I had a fever, my body felt like a truck hit it and I had a splitting headache that begged for me to sleep it off. However…I have Gia so no sleeping it off for me. She was the absolute sweetest. She kept rubbing my head and we sat in my bed watching a lot of Disney channel while she put hair bands on my fingers. She took a nap and I was able to sleep a little. I was in bed by 8:00 which hasn’t happened in forever. So the question is: was it the flu shot even though the doctors swear you can’t get the flu from it or did I catch something from the doctor’s office? Either way, it makes me want to never go to the doctor (which brings me back to square one with this issue).
So, I had a nightmare last night which I am sure was because I was sick but now it has me wondering what it means. First I was at the high school for some reason. I am not sure if I went to school or was a parent. I was trying to get out of the school to get to my ride or my car. I kept going around and around and ending up in the same place. I could see my car but I couldn’t get to it. There was a time limit and I could not figure it out. I started to panic and then suddenly, I was at Target (no analysis needed there…I am there too much) and putting a lot of winter stuff in the cart. Gia was sitting in the seat part of the cart. I got to the check out lines and they were all filled with other women with girls Gia’s age in their carts. I was directed to a short line and when I put stuff up on the belt thing, it wasn’t anything I had picked out. It was all too small and summer stuff. I kept giving it to the cashier and saying, “I changed my mind about this.” Then it dawned on me that I didn’t put any of that stuff in my cart. I looked and Gia looked like Gia but not really. I panicked and said, “This isn’t Gia.” The cashier asked me if I was sure and I saw that the toddler in my cart looked like Gia but had on a different coat and pierced ears. I started screaming that she wasn’t mine and frantically began searching for my Gia. Then I woke up.
What the Hell?
Do you still enjoy the weekends? Are you ready for Halloween? Have you ever had a bad reaction to the flu shot? Have any weird dreams lately?